It's Me Scumbag
Elder Lister
@Pamba 1 hii signal niaje?
@Meria hujapata hii kwa terekram?
COUNTYPOL MERU
SUBCOUNTYPOL MAUA
STAPOL MAUA
SUBJECT: TERRORISM/ESPIONAGE
FOLLOW UP REPORT._ REFER MY EARLIER REPORT VIDE OB NO 10/8/1/2020 AT ABOUT 0500HRS,
APPROX 2KMs FROM THE STATION A COMPLAINANT BY THE NAME MURIITHI MWENDA CAME TO THE POST TO REPORT THAT ABOUT 1 MILLION LOCUSTS HAD INVADED HIS MIRAA PLANTATION AND HE HAD COME TO THE STATION TO SEEK POLICE HELP IN CHASING THE LOCUSTS. AFTER DELIBERATIONS WITH DIVPOL AND COUNTYPOL, A MULTI-AGENCY TEAM LED BY THE COUNTYPOL WERE BRIEFED AND PROCEEDED TO THE SCENE. ARMED WITH TEARGAS AND RIFLES, THE OFFICERS MANAGED TO SCARE THE LOCUSTS OUT OF OUR JURISDICTION. THE LOCUSTS MANAGED TO DESTROY HUGE PARCELS OF LAND COVERED BY THE AREA'S MAIN CASH CROP, MIRAA AKA KHAT.
THE ESTIMATED LOSS IS OVER K.SH1.5 BILLION.
THE MATTER IS CONSIDERED AN ACT OF TERRORISM AND POSSIBLE INTERNATIONAL ESPIONAGE. IT WAS ESTABLISHED THAT THE LOCUSTS HAD MANAGED TO CROSS OVER FROM THE WAR TORN SOMALIA, WRECKED HAVOC IN THE NEIGHBOURING COUNTIES WITH AN AIM OF REACHING THEIR FINAL DESTINATION IN MERU COUNTY. DURING THE INVASION, THE LOCUSTS COULD HAVE BEEN TRANSMITTING REAL TIME UPDATES ON PERSONNEL STRENGTH, EQUIPMENT AND DESTROYING OUR LIVELIHOOD HENCE SABOTAGING OUR FOOD SECURITY. THE INTELLIGENCE COMMITTEE HAD A BRIEF MEETING AND AGREED TO HAND OVER THE CAPTURED LOCUSTS TO ATPU FOR FURTHER COUNTER TERRORISM MEASURES AND SUBSEQUENT ENHANCED INTERROGATION TO ESTABLISH THEIR SOURCE AND MOTIVE.
SIMILARLY PHOTO EVIDENCE OF THE LOCUSTS WERE SENT TO THE OFFICE OF CS AGRICULTURE HON KIUNJURI TO ESTABLISH IF THEY WERE LOCUSTS OR GRASSHOPPERS, WE ALSO SENT THE GRID REFERENCE OF THE AFFECTED AREA, MERU COUNTY TO THE CS TO GIVE TO THE PILOTS HE IS SENDING IN ORDER FOR THEM TO LOCATE THE COUNTY AND START SPRAYING THIS TERRORISTS SENT FROM SOMALIA. OUR OFFICERS REMAIN ON A HIGH ALERT ARE HAVE BEEN GIVEN "SHOOT TO KILL" ORDERS WHENEVER A LOCUST IS SIGHTED. KINDLY BE INFORMED.
FURTHER PROGRESS REPORT TO FOLLOW (
