Holiday Futbol Joke No. 360
- Thread starter It's Me Scumbag
- Start date
DeepInYourMind
Elder Lister
Lakuku finally scores, but game is still on.EEeh, hata mkikaza Chelsea itafunga mabao.
JazzMan
Elder Lister
What do you mean finally scores? He's missed the last 11 games with injury + covid.
QuadroK4000
Elder Lister
Umetoklezea?
DeepInYourMind
Elder Lister
Okay.. but he finally scores, right?
Mwalimu-G
Elder Lister
Anthony Martial: Manchester United striker tells club he wants to leave
Last updated on26 December 202126 December 2021.From the sectionMan Utd
Martial has appeared 10 times in all competitions this season, scoring one goal
French striker Anthony Martial has told Manchester United interim manager Ralf Rangnick he wants to leave.
Rangnick said he "spoke at length" on Wednesday with the 26-year-old, who told him "it's the right time for a change".
Martial has started just two Premier League games this season, scoring once.
Despite his desire to leave Old Trafford, Rangnick confirmed the club had not yet received an offer for the forward.
The player's agent Philippe Lamboley confirmed earlier this month Martial wanted to leave the club in January, adding he would "speak to the club soon".
Rangnick said: "He explained to me that he's been at Manchester United now for the last seven years and he feels it's the right time for a change, to go somewhere else."
Martial signed for United in 2015 from Monaco for £36m, making him the world's most expensive teenage footballer at the time.
He has scored 79 goals in 268 appearances for the Red Devils but has become a fringe player following the arrivals of Cristiano Ronaldo, Edinson Cavani and Jadon Sancho.
He not featured in any of Rangnick's games in charge so far and has made just 10 appearances in all competitions this season.
"I think in a way it is understandable," added Rangnick.
"I could follow his thoughts but on the other hand, it's also important to see the situation of the club. We have Covid times, we have three competitions in which we have high ambitions and want to be as successful as we can be.
"So far, as far as I know, there has been no offer from any other club and as long as this is the case he will stay."
'Vaccine status could be consideration for new signings'
Rangnick also said he shares Liverpool manager Jurgen Klopp's concerns over signing players who are not vaccinated against coronavirus.
Klopp recently said a player's vaccinated status would be "influential" in the club's decision to sign them.
"I think it could be a consideration," Rangnick said.
"This is an issue the clubs seriously have to think about. If you sign a player knowing from the first day that he has not been vaccinated, you have to be aware he might not be available."
"Not only for 10 days, but this could happen regularly in Covid times."
United had to shut the first-team section of their Carrington facility due to a Covid outbreak and have had two Premier League games postponed in December.
The Premier League said 84% of players are on their "vaccination journey" according to recent figures, leaving 16% unvaccinated.
The figures are in line with comparable age groups across society in the UK.
Rangnick used the example of Bayern Munich's Joshua Kimmich as evidence players should get vaccinated as soon as possible.
The Germany international, 26, recently said he regrets not being vaccinated after suffering a lung problem as a result of Covid-19.
"[Kimmich] was extremely hesitant at the beginning and I think in the meantime he has realised it might be a good idea to get vaccinated," Rangnick added.
"He caught Covid and still has some problems with his lungs. I think this is an issue where of course everybody can, and should have, his free will. But in football, especially at this level we are playing at, we need to try to convince our players to get vaccinated.
"It should be in the interest of the players to be vaccinated, but in the end it's a decision that each club has to take by themselves and find the best possible solution."
-BBC Sports
Last updated on26 December 202126 December 2021.From the sectionMan Utd
Martial has appeared 10 times in all competitions this season, scoring one goal
French striker Anthony Martial has told Manchester United interim manager Ralf Rangnick he wants to leave.
Rangnick said he "spoke at length" on Wednesday with the 26-year-old, who told him "it's the right time for a change".
Martial has started just two Premier League games this season, scoring once.
Despite his desire to leave Old Trafford, Rangnick confirmed the club had not yet received an offer for the forward.
The player's agent Philippe Lamboley confirmed earlier this month Martial wanted to leave the club in January, adding he would "speak to the club soon".
Rangnick said: "He explained to me that he's been at Manchester United now for the last seven years and he feels it's the right time for a change, to go somewhere else."
Martial signed for United in 2015 from Monaco for £36m, making him the world's most expensive teenage footballer at the time.
He has scored 79 goals in 268 appearances for the Red Devils but has become a fringe player following the arrivals of Cristiano Ronaldo, Edinson Cavani and Jadon Sancho.
He not featured in any of Rangnick's games in charge so far and has made just 10 appearances in all competitions this season.
"I think in a way it is understandable," added Rangnick.
"I could follow his thoughts but on the other hand, it's also important to see the situation of the club. We have Covid times, we have three competitions in which we have high ambitions and want to be as successful as we can be.
"So far, as far as I know, there has been no offer from any other club and as long as this is the case he will stay."
'Vaccine status could be consideration for new signings'
Rangnick also said he shares Liverpool manager Jurgen Klopp's concerns over signing players who are not vaccinated against coronavirus.
Klopp recently said a player's vaccinated status would be "influential" in the club's decision to sign them.
"I think it could be a consideration," Rangnick said.
"This is an issue the clubs seriously have to think about. If you sign a player knowing from the first day that he has not been vaccinated, you have to be aware he might not be available."
"Not only for 10 days, but this could happen regularly in Covid times."
United had to shut the first-team section of their Carrington facility due to a Covid outbreak and have had two Premier League games postponed in December.
The Premier League said 84% of players are on their "vaccination journey" according to recent figures, leaving 16% unvaccinated.
The figures are in line with comparable age groups across society in the UK.
Rangnick used the example of Bayern Munich's Joshua Kimmich as evidence players should get vaccinated as soon as possible.
The Germany international, 26, recently said he regrets not being vaccinated after suffering a lung problem as a result of Covid-19.
"[Kimmich] was extremely hesitant at the beginning and I think in the meantime he has realised it might be a good idea to get vaccinated," Rangnick added.
"He caught Covid and still has some problems with his lungs. I think this is an issue where of course everybody can, and should have, his free will. But in football, especially at this level we are playing at, we need to try to convince our players to get vaccinated.
"It should be in the interest of the players to be vaccinated, but in the end it's a decision that each club has to take by themselves and find the best possible solution."
-BBC Sports
Mwalimu-G
Elder Lister
Aston Villa 1-3 Chelsea: Thomas Tuchel criticises schedule and says his side 'are struggling'
Last updated on26 December 202126 December 2021.From the sectionPremier League
Aston Villa 1-3 Chelsea: Injury and Covid-hit Blues 'filling holes', says Tuchel
Chelsea boss Thomas Tuchel has called the Premier League schedule "not fair" and said his side "are struggling" after sustaining more injuries.
The Blues won 3-1 at Aston Villa on Sunday, with Romelu Lukaku scoring a goal and winning a penalty in his first match back after a Covid-19 absence.
Chelsea had a request to have their 0-0 draw versus Wolves on 19 December rejected by the Premier League.
"It's like it is - but this cannot be the right way," said Tuchel.
While 15 top-flight matches have been postponed so far in December, Chelsea were playing their eighth game in all competitions in the month and have Brighton to come at Stamford Bridge on Wednesday.
Callum Hudson-Odoi and Lukaku have both missed games because of Covid-19, while forwards Kai Havertz and Timo Werner were still absent and defender Thiago Silva and midfielder N'Golo Kante picked up injuries in the win at Villa Park.
"It's not fair," added Tuchel. "We've all been in bed for 10 days and we play against teams who prepare with games postponed, and who prepare with one week for these matches.
"They make us play all the time, even if we have Covid. We have new injuries and it won't stop. People at the green table, in offices, make these decisions.
"We are struggling, we're pressing our players. I have maximum respect for what the players did. We do changes because of injuries. We don't change for tactical reasons any more."
Romelu Lukaku missed three matches because of Covid-19 and came on as a second-half substitute in the 3-1 win over Aston Villa
"I'm very impressed with my players but super concerned," added Tuchel. "Maybe we made a big mistake letting players play after corona and one or two training sessions.
"But obviously they [the Premier League] made us play and so we play."
He reiterated his call for five substitutes to be allowed in the Premier League again to help deal with the pandemic, but he said there was "zero chance" of that happening.
"We are not protecting the players because we are the only league who doesn't have five changes," Tuchel said.
The rule has remained in the rest of Europe's top leagues since it was introduced in summer 2020.
Villa assistant manager Gary McAllister, who was standing in for boss Steven Gerrard after he tested positive for Covid, said bringing back five substitutes was "a must".
Southampton boss Ralph Hasenhuttl said his team will have to "make a miracle" to face Tottenham on Tuesday, scheduled just over 48 hours after their 3-2 victory over West Ham.
"We face a very strong side with two days' rest and no chance for training. We have to have a good hand in picking the right players and hope that we do," Hasenhuttl said.
"We have no time to prepare and we have to see who is fit, but this is what we have to do if you want something from the Premier League. We will fight again."
Last updated on26 December 202126 December 2021.From the sectionPremier League
Aston Villa 1-3 Chelsea: Injury and Covid-hit Blues 'filling holes', says Tuchel
Chelsea boss Thomas Tuchel has called the Premier League schedule "not fair" and said his side "are struggling" after sustaining more injuries.
The Blues won 3-1 at Aston Villa on Sunday, with Romelu Lukaku scoring a goal and winning a penalty in his first match back after a Covid-19 absence.
Chelsea had a request to have their 0-0 draw versus Wolves on 19 December rejected by the Premier League.
"It's like it is - but this cannot be the right way," said Tuchel.
While 15 top-flight matches have been postponed so far in December, Chelsea were playing their eighth game in all competitions in the month and have Brighton to come at Stamford Bridge on Wednesday.
Callum Hudson-Odoi and Lukaku have both missed games because of Covid-19, while forwards Kai Havertz and Timo Werner were still absent and defender Thiago Silva and midfielder N'Golo Kante picked up injuries in the win at Villa Park.
"It's not fair," added Tuchel. "We've all been in bed for 10 days and we play against teams who prepare with games postponed, and who prepare with one week for these matches.
"They make us play all the time, even if we have Covid. We have new injuries and it won't stop. People at the green table, in offices, make these decisions.
"We are struggling, we're pressing our players. I have maximum respect for what the players did. We do changes because of injuries. We don't change for tactical reasons any more."
"I'm very impressed with my players but super concerned," added Tuchel. "Maybe we made a big mistake letting players play after corona and one or two training sessions.
"But obviously they [the Premier League] made us play and so we play."
He reiterated his call for five substitutes to be allowed in the Premier League again to help deal with the pandemic, but he said there was "zero chance" of that happening.
"We are not protecting the players because we are the only league who doesn't have five changes," Tuchel said.
The rule has remained in the rest of Europe's top leagues since it was introduced in summer 2020.
Villa assistant manager Gary McAllister, who was standing in for boss Steven Gerrard after he tested positive for Covid, said bringing back five substitutes was "a must".
Southampton boss Ralph Hasenhuttl said his team will have to "make a miracle" to face Tottenham on Tuesday, scheduled just over 48 hours after their 3-2 victory over West Ham.
"We face a very strong side with two days' rest and no chance for training. We have to have a good hand in picking the right players and hope that we do," Hasenhuttl said.
"We have no time to prepare and we have to see who is fit, but this is what we have to do if you want something from the Premier League. We will fight again."