Man-useless kichapo

"Gathering the ball on the right flank, Salah lured Martinez into the foolish belief he had a chance of winning the ball.

What happened next shouldn’t exist outside of a Harry Potter novel; the Egypt international body swerved and swept the ball away from the United defender, who must have been rueing all the life choices that left him open to this humiliation.

Attempting to recover a sliver of dignity, Martinez went back for more but ended up on his arse with the ridicule of the Kop ringing in his ears. Never mind cooking, Salah had flipped him like a lunchtime omelette."
 
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