Burner's Movie Reviews: Black Widow (2021)

Burner

Burner

Elder Lister
The first marvel movie post-Endgame has Natasha Romanov and her sister working together to bring down the program that brainwashed her, her sister and others into becoming the martial arts super spies that all russian women in marvel movies seem to be.
The piece is set sometime after Captain America: Civil War.

While the acting isnt bad, the pacing is all over the place and every keeps reminding us that the avengers are somewhere, which makes you wish they would appear and improve the flick. The movie slows down in the second act and exposition is vomited out by characters like they are allergic to it. Jumping from location to location is jarring as you have to question how characters manage to travel without any hitches. Hell, they flew a helicopter from Budapest to some place in Russia with seemingly no problems.

The movie is rated PG-13 so basically no one bleeds. And I'm sorry but when did The Black Widow take some super soldier serum? Coz she seems impervious to falls, kicks, explosions, car and helicopter crushes, coming away with nothing but some slight bruising. One can only suspend disbelief so far.

The movie feels lacking in anything marvel-ous (great pun). Watch it with some vodka and hopefully you blackout from the latter than the former.

Catch it at the cinemas, or stream it on android boxes or torrent it since HD copies are out.

🔥🔥🔥 out 5 burns.
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I've never disputed the fact that Scarlett is hot and has a banging bod, but I don't believe she can carry an entire movie by herself. Right after Captain America, she is the second most useless Avenger ... And that's saying ALOT considering you have Falcon who is LITERALLY absolutely useless as well.
 
Nefertities said:
I've never disputed the fact that Scarlett is hot and has a banging bod, but I don't believe she can carry an entire movie by herself. Right after Captain America, she is the second most useless Avenger ... And that's saying ALOT considering you have Falcon who is LITERALLY absolutely useless as well.
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Why is Cap useless?
 
Wtf is his purpose even? I wouldn't watch an entire Captain America movie just like I'm not about to watch an entire Black Widow one.

What's his superpower? Having a tight a$$? :rolleyes: They didn't even bother giving the character a good sense of humour or clever lines. I mean, why for is he even here?
 
Cap has enhanced strength, speed, stamina and healing compared to the normal person. He has extensive Combat training and is an extremely good military tactician.
There is a reason he is referred to as a super-soldier.

His purpose? In the 40s he was basically propaganda for the Allies. In the comics he knocked out hitler. Other than that he leads the avengers and is an agent of shield.
He is in fact a superhero that does superhero things
 
Burner said:
Cap has enhanced strength, speed, stamina and healing compared to the normal person. He has extensive Combat training and is an extremely good military tactician.
There is a reason he is referred to as a super-soldier.

His purpose? In the 40s he was basically propaganda for the Allies. In the comics he knocked out hitler. Other than that he leads the avengers and is an agent of shield.
He is in fact a superhero that does superhero things
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What is the difference between captain america and black widow?
 
It's a nice movie. Better than many others out here. The story line is consistent and acting well done though fiction kiasi.
 
Burner said:
If you need to kill 2hrs, sure it worth it. If you really want to watch a great action movie then this isnt it in my opinion.
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Unfortunately it looks like MCU will continue to be boring going forward. Kwanza I have a feeling these ppl will ruin blade by making it PG 13.
 
Burner said:
If you need to kill 2hrs, sure it worth it. If you really want to watch a great action movie then this isnt it in my opinion.
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Is it true that the CG gender swap of Task Master is noticeable in the movie? I hear that the body and the female head do not match, the body look big since its a man :ROFLMAO:
 
Nefertities said:
I've never disputed the fact that Scarlett is hot and has a banging bod, but I don't believe she can carry an entire movie by herself. Right after Captain America, she is the second most useless Avenger ... And that's saying ALOT considering you have Falcon who is LITERALLY absolutely useless as well.
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The fact you forgot Hawkeye says everything about his usefulness.
 
neloangelo said:
Is it true that the CG gender swap of Task Master is noticeable in the movie? I hear that the body and the female head do not match, the body look big since its a man :ROFLMAO:
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Taskmaster looks kinda weird, but it doesn't matter much. But originally in the comics Taskmaster is a man.
 
neloangelo said:
Unfortunately it looks like MCU will continue to be boring going forward. Kwanza I have a feeling these ppl will ruin blade by making it PG 13.
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They are doing a blade movie? I didnt know. But i have zero excitement for Shang-Chi, Eternals or even Morbius. Hopefully im wrong and they are better than i anticipate, but i dont see things improving until the next Thor or Dr. Strange movie.
 
Burner said:
They are doing a blade movie? I didnt know. But i have zero excitement for Shang-Chi, Eternals or even Morbius. Hopefully im wrong and they are better than i anticipate, but i dont see things improving until the next Thor or Dr. Strange movie.
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It looks like you have started getting tired of MCU. Even I have almost zero faith that disney will produce a quality super hero movie.
It is rumored that nowadays movies in major studios are done by committees that's why most are average.
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neloangelo said:
It looks like you have started getting tired of MCU. Even I have almost zero faith that disney will produce a quality super hero movie.
It is rumored that nowadays movies in major studios are done by committees that's why most are average.
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Im actually looking forward to What If..?
As an animated anthology i think they will be some decent stories.
Wasnt there supposed to br a Spawn reboot with Jamie Foxx in the lead?
 
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