Queen Elizabeth
- Thread starter Okiya
- Start date
Denis Young
Elder Lister
Are we getting another holiday?
Imesema nini
Haiya! kwani tweet imengolewa?
Amekutana na equalizer..... Dead
kijanamrefu
Elder Lister
Playing on loop in anticipation cc all Africans
kingolonde
Elder Lister
I seriously think Liz is no more.
Charlie might soon be "sworn in" just after Ruto
Charlie might soon be "sworn in" just after Ruto
Denis Young
Elder Lister
Ze Queen is Dead!
Hawa nyakeru wanafanya maisha iwe ngumu. I guess they have already began printing new currency with a King's portrait.
Since we had copied this shit after independence, mimi labda nihamie Uganda ka pesa zetu zingekuwa na mbisha ya JS.
Sigwesi na sigwesi tupia mbesha zko na mbisha ya huyo jamaa
Since we had copied this shit after independence, mimi labda nihamie Uganda ka pesa zetu zingekuwa na mbisha ya JS.
Sigwesi na sigwesi tupia mbesha zko na mbisha ya huyo jamaa
kijanamrefu
Elder Lister
Aviator
Elder Lister
Mamayooooo!
Princess Diana,
you remember the woman who came with her people to see your people,
the one who gave your people goats,
the one whose son had made your heart go paragasha,
the one in whose huge house you went to live in,
that one of 6 mirrions umbrellas and matching hats,
You remember her?
Your mother in law?
they have just announced,
Womanz has joined her ancestors!
We need your signal on how we should treat her.
Princess Diana,
Before we remove our bras,
Before we start beating our breasts against the wall,
Before we allow mucus to form tributaries across our faces,
Before we smear our thighs with cowdung,
Before we open WhatsApp groups for contributions,
Before we start renting tents and plastic seats for matanga,
Before we start peeling potatoes and sorting njahi for the funeral,
Before the woman's guild choir start rehearsing,
Before we summon the chief to give us directions,
Before we advertise her demise on Inooro,
Send us a signal on how we should mourn her.
Princess Diana,
this your children's grandmother
is on her way to where you went in 1997,
any minute now she will knock on your door decorated in bling,
a small bag full of title deeds for lands she did not buy,
and a plastic jug full of MauMau blood and tears,
Diana, how will you greet her?
Will you bow your head or roll your eyes,
Diana, we need to know so that we can do the same!
Princess Diana,
this your husband's mother,
Us goat wives,
Us net wives
Us side chicks,
Us in Nairobi situationships,
All of us have finally united,
we want you to signal us in wholesale,
before we block these sons of Adam from accessing Canaan for 21 days and 21 nights,
Madam tell us, do we shave our hair and smear soil on our heads,
Or do we sip wine, do we swallow roast meat at Kamakis and buy expensive wig as if nothing has happened!
Princess Diana,
Mother of two,
Your children are big ooh,
One got married to a woman whose stomach is still flat after three children,
The other one married a woman whose mother came from slaves,
Diana,
you should have been at the wedding,
D-U-R-A-M-A! I tell you,
You should have seen the tabloid' headlines,
Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaai!
Ah, that son of yours and his wife with black blood suffered by a lot,
And that is why we are asking for a signal,
How would you like us to twist our lips?
Princess Diana,
Our African inlaw,
Eh, that Egyptian prince was our son you know,
We're it not for that accident,
Haaaaaaaa!
We would have eaten rice and drunk muratina for seven days and seven nights in your ruracio,
Ah! Diana the mukimo we would have 'kimmed',
goats we would have slaughtered,
Vitenges we would have mixed and matched,
Sauti Sol, Gatutura, would have performed non stop
We need to know what happened in that tunnel before we summon our tears!
Princess Diana,
the mother of your husband,
that same husband who was harvesting his ex girlfriend
While you were still together,
that same husband who made you cry until you removed heart,
is on her way to your world,
when you see her,
Don't bother asking her who your manz married,
Because nie reke ngwire Diana...
Just ask about your grandchildren,
But before that,
Diana,
this your in law,
Who they made us call queen,
and me the only queen I know is Paloma of TikTok,
this your in law,
Madam,
Send us a signal,
On how we should mourn her!
Princess Diana,
you remember the woman who came with her people to see your people,
the one who gave your people goats,
the one whose son had made your heart go paragasha,
the one in whose huge house you went to live in,
that one of 6 mirrions umbrellas and matching hats,
You remember her?
Your mother in law?
they have just announced,
Womanz has joined her ancestors!
We need your signal on how we should treat her.
Princess Diana,
Before we remove our bras,
Before we start beating our breasts against the wall,
Before we allow mucus to form tributaries across our faces,
Before we smear our thighs with cowdung,
Before we open WhatsApp groups for contributions,
Before we start renting tents and plastic seats for matanga,
Before we start peeling potatoes and sorting njahi for the funeral,
Before the woman's guild choir start rehearsing,
Before we summon the chief to give us directions,
Before we advertise her demise on Inooro,
Send us a signal on how we should mourn her.
Princess Diana,
this your children's grandmother
is on her way to where you went in 1997,
any minute now she will knock on your door decorated in bling,
a small bag full of title deeds for lands she did not buy,
and a plastic jug full of MauMau blood and tears,
Diana, how will you greet her?
Will you bow your head or roll your eyes,
Diana, we need to know so that we can do the same!
Princess Diana,
this your husband's mother,
Us goat wives,
Us net wives
Us side chicks,
Us in Nairobi situationships,
All of us have finally united,
we want you to signal us in wholesale,
before we block these sons of Adam from accessing Canaan for 21 days and 21 nights,
Madam tell us, do we shave our hair and smear soil on our heads,
Or do we sip wine, do we swallow roast meat at Kamakis and buy expensive wig as if nothing has happened!
Princess Diana,
Mother of two,
Your children are big ooh,
One got married to a woman whose stomach is still flat after three children,
The other one married a woman whose mother came from slaves,
Diana,
you should have been at the wedding,
D-U-R-A-M-A! I tell you,
You should have seen the tabloid' headlines,
Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaai!
Ah, that son of yours and his wife with black blood suffered by a lot,
And that is why we are asking for a signal,
How would you like us to twist our lips?
Princess Diana,
Our African inlaw,
Eh, that Egyptian prince was our son you know,
We're it not for that accident,
Haaaaaaaa!
We would have eaten rice and drunk muratina for seven days and seven nights in your ruracio,
Ah! Diana the mukimo we would have 'kimmed',
goats we would have slaughtered,
Vitenges we would have mixed and matched,
Sauti Sol, Gatutura, would have performed non stop
We need to know what happened in that tunnel before we summon our tears!
Princess Diana,
the mother of your husband,
that same husband who was harvesting his ex girlfriend
While you were still together,
that same husband who made you cry until you removed heart,
is on her way to your world,
when you see her,
Don't bother asking her who your manz married,
Because nie reke ngwire Diana...
Just ask about your grandchildren,
But before that,
Diana,
this your in law,
Who they made us call queen,
and me the only queen I know is Paloma of TikTok,
this your in law,
Madam,
Send us a signal,
On how we should mourn her!
