Meffi thread, Literally.

Lessons I learnt a long my field trips...
1. If travelling kwa gari yako have a roll of tissue. Kwa PSV, carry a roll of tissue and atleast a change of clothes in your bag. You never know who, when, where...
2. In your car, have a bottle of water
3. Have a handkerchief or two.


Elder Lister
All meffi protocols observed.
Now, Last weekend on Saturday Mwarimo got in a fucken situation which no one can describe, just my sweet Lydia, wifey.

Now, On that Friday mwarimo was served his best meal, Sukuma wiki, nyama and Ugali. Kitu 1 am was already on/off toilet. Still was struggling with some gout on my left big toe, good reason to see a doc the following day pale Machakos.

Sato came, checked in the toilet early in the morning, which I thought was my last 'drive' . Set off kitu 9am. Took the shortest route possible.

Sasa wadau, after kitu 18kms(Machakos is just 24km via the short route. Murram road) Mwarimo akahisi kukojoa, parked the car mahali, kukojoa, I felt like I releasing some full 'bomb' Wadau the 'bomb' came out with all the greens fed the previous night.

Panic nayo! The shit already flowing down like river Malewa pale Delamere Kinangop kukinyesha, in a fuckin short!No tissue in the car! Keep a jacket in the car for some bad day. Locked the windows, used the jacket to kupangusa the mess, with very 'greeny'bottoms had to just turn around and head back home to clean myself and the car.

I did ring my wifey,instructed her I should get a full bucket of warm water,Now, how do I alight the car hapo mbele ya 'Mburoti' with all the greeny shit on my behinds! Wadau nililetewa leso, wifey told everyone ati I got a hip 'dislocation' and the hip must be tied tight!

Lipia bibi mahali, my sweet wifey washed all the mess, but boxer tulitupa. Cleaned, then took off for Machakos for the second trip. A few things I got to learn, 'bombing' under the 'NTSA' should be tried whilst home.

1. Buy ur self that fucken car if you can, Imagine kama ningekuwa kwa public means.
2. Make your wifey ur fucking good friend. will wash your shit.
3. Keep some extra clothing, baby wipes and toilet paper in ur fucking car, you may need them sometime.
4. My first Hekaya, just ignore any fucking gramma.
Pole sana, joining nduthi gang sio macheso.