Flee into the Planteshen!

[Tiiga Waana]

https://www.the-star.co.ke/news/2022-04-01-35-year-old-man-killed-over-infidelity/

Wow, homicide is always tragic news but one can’t help naughtily smiling and even helplessly bursting into bouts of mirth that this amorous lady took to her heels to the dreaded planteshen when she was caught pants down on the act.

What a pity that her partner in crime unwillingly became the sacrificial lamb and paid the ultimate price even though I suppose they were enjoying the ‘chewing’ in equal and egalitarian fashion.

My humble advise to Honourable Senators is to wisen up and marry, or failing that, avoid ever shagging someone’s wife in their domicile and particularly in their marital bed please.
We do not want to ever lose a Senator in such cataclysmic situations. Nyumba usiolipa....

 

[Mongrel]

https://www.the-star.co.ke/news/2022-04-01-35-year-old-man-killed-over-infidelity/

Wow, homicide is always tragic news but one can’t help naughtily smiling and even helplessly bursting into bouts of mirth that this amorous lady took to her heels to the dreaded planteshen when she was caught pants down on the act.

What a pity that her partner in crime unwillingly became the sacrificial lamb and paid the ultimate price even though I suppose they were enjoying the ‘chewing’ in equal and egalitarian fashion.

My humble advise to Honourable Senators is to wisen up and marry, or failing that, avoid ever shagging someone’s wife in their domicile and particularly in their marital bed please.
We do not want to ever lose a Senator in such cataclysmic situations. Nyumba usiolipa....

Usikamulie kunguru ya mwenye kulipa huko

 

[Aviator]

What defense would you put for the guy of you are to represent him?

 

[Tiiga Waana]

What defense would you put for the guy of you are to represent him?

Three defences actually:

a). Crime Passionnel
b). Dry spell
c). Being Lured by the Naughty Girl

But that is all water under the bridge because our Guy has already kicked the bucket and is now about to start pushing daisies furiously.
No amount of defence, even with a Queen’s Counsel would persuade him to take another breath.

 

[Aviator]

Three defences actually:

a). Crime Passionnel
b). Dry spell
c). Being Lured by the Naughty Girl

But that is all water under the bridge because our Guy has already kicked the bucket and is now about to start pushing daisies furiously.
No amount of defence, even with a Queen’s Counsel would persuade him to take another breath.

Am talking of the killer.
The bull has rested, ikiwa na nyasi kwa mdomo. We can only celebrate him and hope that the pussy was worth it.

 

[Tiiga Waana]

Am talking of the killer.
The bull has rested, ikiwa na nyasi kwa mdomo. We can only celebrate him and hope that the pussy was worth it.

I beg your pardon on the above mix-up. Thought you were talking of the mwenda-zake.
Right. The Guy has only one arrow on his bow - plead Temporary Insanity.
He will have to convince the Court that scene he witnessed on his bed was so shocking and traumatic that he couldn’t control his response.

But that will only work if he had not suspected that the wife was cheating on him and was spying to find out the truth. Such a scenario would imply premeditation.

@Aviator, I honestly hope you are not asking this in anticipation of finding a defence in future!

 

[wrongturn]

I beg your pardon on the above mix-up. Thought you were talking of the mwenda-zake.
Right. The Guy has only one arrow on his bow - plead Temporary Insanity.
He will have to convince the Court that scene he witnessed on his bed was so shocking and traumatic that he couldn’t control his response.

But that will only work if he had not suspected that the wife was cheating on him and was spying to find out the truth. Such a scenario would imply premeditation.

@Aviator, I honestly hope you are not asking this in anticipation of finding a defence in future!

he can be given man slaughter, especially if he just picked a random weapon.. Crime of passion.

 

[Aviator]

I beg your pardon on the above mix-up. Thought you were talking of the mwenda-zake.
Right. The Guy has only one arrow on his bow - plead Temporary Insanity.
He will have to convince the Court that scene he witnessed on his bed was so shocking and traumatic that he couldn’t control his response.

But that will only work if he had not suspected that the wife was cheating on him and was spying to find out the truth. Such a scenario would imply premeditation.

@Aviator, I honestly hope you are not asking this in anticipation of finding a defence in future!

Well, I have no reason to commit such murder/manslaughter. If I find a man in bed with my khupipi, I will let them finish, then talk to both of them and convince them to go away together. I can't kill for K which is constant anyway.

 

[Mongrel]

Well, I have no reason to commit such murder/manslaughter. If I find a man in bed with my khupipi, I will let them finish, then talk to both of them and convince them to go away together. I can't kill for K which is constant anyway.

You can only kill for m,hio nayo tunajua

 

[It's Me Scumbag]

he can be given man slaughter, especially if he just picked a random weapon.. Crime of passion.

A random weapon. Yes. It just happened to be a panga. Truly a crime of passion.

 

[Aviator]

You can only kill for m,hio nayo tunajua

Come clearly, wamagui.
What is m?

 

[wrongturn]

A random weapon. Yes. It just happened to be a panga. Truly a crime of passion.

nani hana panga kwa nyumba, ? natural instincts will force you to pick it up

 

[Mongrel]

Come clearly, wamagui.
What is m?

Matina ma arume

 

[Tiiga Waana]

Well, I have no reason to commit such murder/manslaughter. If I find a man in bed with my khupipi, I will let them finish, then talk to both of them and convince them to go away together. I can't kill for K which is constant anyway.

Good for you @Aviator. Well done. You are a well balanced Man all round.

I once heard of a Mzungu who found his Kikuyu wife with a hefty Kikuyu man in bed.
Legend has it that the mzungu immediately proceeded to the kitchen, made them tea and sandwiches and brought them in a tray to the bedroom where the pair were cowing wondering about their fate.

The mzungu proceeded to invite them to sit up and have their teas while he stirred sugar to their beverages.
As they were sitting up seeping their drinks, he kindly covered their arms and toes with the duvet against the winter’s cold.

When the drinks were finished, he got out his pistol, undressed and ordered the man to ‘chukua sabuni’ and proceeded to reach the Senate’s 7 shots threshold in the presence of his shocked and bewildered wife.

 

[It's Me Scumbag]

Good for you @Aviator. Well done. You are a well balanced Man all round.

I once heard of a Mzungu who found his Kikuyu wife with a hefty Kikuyu man in bed.
Legend has it that the mzungu immediately proceeded to the kitchen, made them tea and sandwiches and brought them in a tray to the bedroom where the pair were cowing wondering about their fate.

The mzungu proceeded to invite them to sit up and have their teas while he stirred sugar to their beverages.
As they were sitting up seeping their drinks, he kindly covered their arms and toes with the duvet against the winter’s cold.

When the drinks were finished, he got out his pistol, undressed and ordered the man to ‘chukua sabuni’ and proceeded to reach the Senate’s 7 shots threshold in the presence of his shocked and bewildered wife.

As they were sitting up seeping their drinks, he kindly covered their arms and toes with the duvet against the winter’s cold.

Maybe ni mimi sijui duvet hukaa aje...

 

[Tiiga Waana]

As they were sitting up seeping their drinks, he kindly covered their arms and toes with the duvet against the winter’s cold.

Maybe ni mimi sijui duvet hukaa aje...

Substitute duvet for a blanket. Almost the same but duvet more warmer and insulated.

 

[It's Me Scumbag]

Substitute duvet for a blanket. Almost the same but duvet more warmer and insulated.

Still it would not work if it is true they were sipping English tea and taking bittings off some muffins...

 

[kijanamrefu]

As they were sitting up seeping their drinks, he kindly covered their arms and toes with the duvet against the winter’s cold.

Maybe ni mimi sijui duvet hukaa aje...

Maybe they had toes on their fingers.

 

[Aviator]

Matina ma arume

Kwani unataka kupatiana yako?

 

[Aviator]

Good for you @Aviator. Well done. You are a well balanced Man all round.

I once heard of a Mzungu who found his Kikuyu wife with a hefty Kikuyu man in bed.
Legend has it that the mzungu immediately proceeded to the kitchen, made them tea and sandwiches and brought them in a tray to the bedroom where the pair were cowing wondering about their fate.

The mzungu proceeded to invite them to sit up and have their teas while he stirred sugar to their beverages.
As they were sitting up seeping their drinks, he kindly covered their arms and toes with the duvet against the winter’s cold.

When the drinks were finished, he got out his pistol, undressed and ordered the man to ‘chukua sabuni’ and proceeded to reach the Senate’s 7 shots threshold in the presence of his shocked and bewildered wife.

I would have done the same. Though wangegawana threshold kwa mkia na khupipi. Kisha niwafukuze.